Joy

couple_walking

What is Joy but this, that I am always feeling and doing? Is it not me that is choosing? So it is this then that I will be doing, forever more Would you like to walk with me and spare a moment of yours? That I may share but a glance of what I have seen In my Return to Forever I have seen Peace and it looks like this I have felt joy and you have been there Let us remember together I have separated out the confusion and turmoil as if it were a novel that I was reading Yet, it is no … [Read more...]

I Saw a Man

grease

I saw a man -- old, with cold greased iron and steel Scorched by the direct lick of the sun And I thought to myself  -- that's it I want to roll around in it -- be dirtied by it -- that's where I want to be with my depth Like an aged mechanic "Bring your engine to me and I'll fix it" I want my Death to be under my fingernails; unable to clean it away I want to reek of the oil of Death So I never forget my impermanence … [Read more...]

Nowhere to be found

arrow_sign

I have torn this thing apart...time and time again And found Nothing Hollowed echoes remain Of footsteps past...Nothing lasts in this shattered domain What was it that I would hope to find anyway? Me? Where would I be? In this soliloquy There are no arrows that point to self Save vain interpretations and vile representation Of a mangled belief-based false reflection I then, am left, when all else falls away And is swept away There is glory in winter’s death For I am … [Read more...]

The Illusions of Self

create

Who do you think that you are? A collection of memories, the titles you've received? Your pain or trauma that you think defines you? Your race or sex, the compliments or insults that you get? Does your name represent the self that you've gained? Do you associate yourself with these times or your assigned purpose, reason or rhythm? Who are you, your spirit or soul and the baggage that they hold? Or the stories that you've been told? Are you your beliefs that give you relief? You decide who you … [Read more...]

On Time!

time

"Be here now." Really? Has anyone ever stopped to think about this? By the time you even perceive "Now" it is the past! Then you may say "Be in the present time." The very present is built on fragmented memories of the past and projections of the future. If anyone ever did find "Now," they would soon realize that there isn't anything there, because time is fleeting and so too are we, chasing after it and getting stuck in it! Time is a necessary illusion, much like a language. They both … [Read more...]

“don” We Now

man_snow

In retrospect, I have found a congruent theme and archetype in my life: The "don." Actually three in particular: don Juan De Marco: The hopeless romantic that sees everything and everyone at their fullest potential and is in love with life and experience. don Quixote: Dreams the impossible dream and sees the endless potential in all things and stands up against any and all wrong. don Juan Matus: The Nagual that holds the space for change and personal power. One who is prepared to rule … [Read more...]

Who/What am I? An Exploration of Self and Beyond: A Requiem

zedek

There is a moment, between sleep and wake, night and day, between the notes in a concerto, life and death, between the eyes of youth and old age...all unspoken, all unheard, yet certain; in the stillness of a stone or a whisper's breath in the wind and ice melting and water freezing or fire burning wood to ash...where things are both eternal yet, never last. I am this lasting. I am this fleeting...moment. My memory is like an old photo album in a baseboard attic. My mind is like a shattered … [Read more...]

Reality Check

crazy

"They could be made to accept the most flagrant violations of reality, because they never fully grasped the enormity of what was demanded of them, and were not sufficiently interested in public events to notice what was happening. By lack of understanding they remained sane. They simply swallowed everything, and what they swallowed did them no harm, because it left no residue behind, just as a grain of corn will pass undigested through the body of a bird." – George Orwell in 1984 The Earth … [Read more...]

What then is Magic?

zedek

Let's jump right in. If you try to use magic, it will inevitably destroy you, as will any power. Whatever you use comes back to haunt you. One must become Magic. So what then is Magic? Magic is the self-aware matrix of existence and non-existence. Like intent, it brings things into being. It is the crux between. It is the whisper within that says this is the way, and if you look away for a moment it is gone - and yet, you can't even look straight at it. It is the hairbreadth of instant. It … [Read more...]

Nothing At All

dolphins

"Horror, I've seen horror...the horrors that you've seen. But that gives you no right to call me a murderer. You have the right to kill me, you have the right to do that but, you have no right to judge me." - Marlon Brando in Apocalypse Now (Hearts of Darkness) The above quote was a portion of Brando's last monologue to explain that his atrocities were no different than the atrocities of his country, or, for that matter, no different than the atrocities of religion. How is it that so … [Read more...]