Winter arrived in high fashion recently with a weekend storm and plenty of heavy, wet snow. I’m pleased that the temperature will remain warmish for several days so this first batch of beautiful annoyance can quickly convert to river water. I’ll take it as nature’s way of saying, “Put down that shovel, I’ve got your back,” which is the perfectly apt metaphor for this vintage Minnesotan.

Part of me wonders what the winter will bring to our larger story as the transition to the new reality gains momentum. If the energy field of human emotion is directly related to the intensity of weather experienced, then we may be in for a tumultuous ride this season. The contraction of cold weather this year is well-timed to the intense emotional contractions in a large part of humanity feeling less in control than ever. Many of us who are stepping through the doorway into a new world may have forgotten how challenged we were to let go of what we thought was important and real, but a large number of people are now on the cusp of facing choices that need to resolve in a few months or years instead of the decades we had available.

The upside, as time compresses, is that the pathways have been made in the consciousness of the collective by those who went before, and a certain ease of transition is possible that was not available to those in the first wave. The trail has been blazed.

This is December, the end of a cycle. We are also two years away and rapidly closing in on the end of many significant cycles, well-described by the Mayans. The contractions grow tight among those making futile attempts to preserve the status quo, i.e. the dominance of mind and the binding of others through fear. The tide has turned and the plug has been pulled from Duality. Energy drains from the old structures to be rewoven into new forms, and those still bound to the old ways eventually face the same choice: Release their own bindings born of the old story or resist change and further contract into the fear.

Beliefs persist among some people that we are going to be saved either by masters or ETs, depending on whether the teachings are traditional or new age. These views are about salvation, not choice. Such perspectives are externally focused, which is a sign they are based in Duality. I use this as an example, but everything that attempts to pull you out of yourself or direct your mind away from your inner knowing is exactly the kind of binding and conditioning to which I refer.

Sometimes it is taught that the choice is simply between Love or fear. I might say that the choice is between Love or anything not of Love, or what has essence and what does not. And, this choice is made in every moment, not just when making large decisions. The “shift” is partly about realignment within self, shifting focus to inner guidance and inner choices. The move is toward sovereign individuation within a coherent whole; a unified being, but multifaceted and conscious of such.

This is the time of the great dissolution of the old story, and what has kept a certain reality intact for participants no longer has energy. The title this month, The Split Hits the Fan, recognizes the acceleration of change and a kind of crunch-time for determining on which evolutionary path to proceed. The choice may not be conscious for many people, but at some point the opportunity to choose the way of the heart will be presented. The response becomes the choice and the process unfolds from that point.

Moving out of polarity and making the choice for Love is challenging in a world constantly focused on money, politics, power and war. Yet, as distortions grow larger in those areas, the easier it becomes to disavow oneself from their influence, mostly because staying connected is too painful. With the pathways in place, many others will find their way to a new reality and a new earth experience.

The energy is flowing from the old story to the new at an ever-increasing rate, and the waves of change are creating a mighty surf. Welcome to 2011. Hang ten.

My column did not appear in last month’s issue of The Edge. ‘Ja miss me? Instead of writing I was busy painting and organizing furniture in my new home, the story of which appeared in the September issue as an example of Mutuality in the New Living Field. After painting the living room five times (no, not a typo) to get the color just so, I am finally free to tackle what’s next.

People complain about packing when contemplating a move, but preparation of the new space and unpacking are the major tasks, in my view. I’m definitely glad to be over the hump, so to speak. And, the New Field continues to surprise, as a recent hail storm triggered insurance to fund needed roof repairs and other projects. Guess I can stop wondering how I was going to pay for that.

The New Living Field is the name I use for the structure of consciousness we are shifting into as Duality disappears. For clarity, I use the term Duality to describe a framework of consciousness that splinters awareness into perceptions of separation. Duality, as I use the term, is distinct from the spiritual or philosophical doctrine of dualism. Dualism, to me, refers to a way the mind perceives the nature of existence, realizing that the perception of “dual” was formed from within the structure of Duality and its design of splitting and defining. It is the structure or matrix of Duality that I see dissolving. We are yet to find out if dualism survives, or any other isms we’ve created along the way.

In August I offered a list of seven emerging qualities of the New Living Field, described as best I can given our limited experience with this new reality and even greater limitation of words. Previously I expanded, or perhaps expounded, on Mutuality. This time I’ll take a whack at conscious creation and how this living field is responsive to the desires of Heart and Soul.

Conscious creation may be a familiar phrase, but when heard do you envision an act with purpose, or a self-aware existence? I’m guessing the former, given the popularity of books and seminars on manifestation. Thing is, many of those teachings are from the old story and focus on using the mind to direct energy. Also, the process is outcome-based, often with an agenda motivated by fear or lack. Instead, what if Conscious Creation is experienced as a state of Being rather than seen as a method of manipulation?

Do we really know the deepest desires of our hearts and souls? I suspect not. We may think about how we wish things would be in our lives, but in our present state the mind’s vision is clouded by beliefs and perceived limitations. Authentic heart essence and embodied Soul know deep clarity, and my sense is that we’ve barely begun opening to and receiving a level of fulfillment unlike any we’ve known. If we can’t really know what fulfillment is, then what’s the plan? The plan is to continue the process of personal transformation that leads out of the matrix of Duality and into the matrix of the New Living Field. We’re already in that process, although each person is at a different place in the sequence.

The New Living Field is the alchemy of Life and Light. Dualism would split Matter from Spirit, but there is no separation in the new matrix. We are individuated aspects within the whole, unified but simultaneously unique and sovereign. A paradox for the mind, perhaps, but you may have noticed that the need to understand or define is melting away as Duality dissolves. So, no problem. It is now the Field that orchestrates, and its design is to create fulfillment for the Creator within the Creation. That’d be you. And me. All of us coordinated in a stunning co-creation.

The more we transform and release our old stories, the more we step into greater authenticity and alignment with self. The more we choose alignment the higher our frequency goes and the more the field can “feel/read” us. The more we are read, the more fulfillment is delivered to us with ever decreasing effort on our part. We BE and feel our authentic experience and the field responds, bringing fulfilling experiences we didn’t know were possible while providing simultaneous fulfillment to others.

The future isn’t what it used to be, however you want to interpret that.

I have previously written about the end of Duality, how judgment creates perceptual splits within that system, and made observations about the nature of the New Living Field. The New Living Field is what I call the new matrix of consciousness into which we are now making the “shift of the ages.” This matrix is where Light and Life, the spiritual and the material, have merged into a unified field along with all other polarities.

I often say we are installing a new operating system. The implication is that differences exist between the old and the new, and like our experience with computers we may find that many changes are required in us to accommodate the new system. To continue this metaphor, our bodies are the hardware and the new matrix is the software, and both are being upgraded. The challenge for most of us is that no user manual exists for the new system, and some of us feel we are writing it as we go. In this case, the act of writing is literal – and I’d like to expand on one emerging feature of the New Living Field.

Last month I listed mutuality as a quality of the New Living Field. By mutual, I mean that energy always moves in ways that do not create imbalance. In Duality, we had numerous experiences where energy imbalances were created by non-mutual exchanges. We had winners and losers, and takers and givers. Once we became entranced with money as a substitute for Life, we concocted endless ways to manipulate people for its acquisition. As Duality breathes its final breath, we see maximum polarization in that old field and gain clarity about the mechanisms that have extracted energy from the body of humanity, and most of us are happy to be moving beyond such a life-diminishing experience.

Mutuality might be thought of as the outcome of perfect synchronicity. Consciousness within the New Living Field orchestrates the movement and interconnections of all parties to the synchronicity. The field has been created to fulfill the authentic soul or heart desires of all participants, and to do so seamlessly and without effort. This quality of orchestration is why most of the training about using the mind to direct energy is now irrelevant. In the New Field there is no hierarchy, no necessary manipulation of energy and no dominance of mind.

A personal experience illustrates the gifts of mutuality in action. Last spring my partner Michele and I decided to buy a house after renting for several years. Our lease would end in August, so we began a search by monitoring MLS listings for anything of interest. We had our list of desired home features, including distance from work, price points and certain geographic boundaries. Months went by in frustration as we found nothing that seemed to fit.

Finally, at a recent dental appointment the hygienist asked Michele what was new, and she explained we were looking for a house. Suddenly, a sequence of events went into motion as the hygienist spoke of a very nice home near her own, and very motivated sellers being relocated out of state. We were unexpectedly led to a home perfect for us in an area we weren’t looking and at a price that had fallen from a number we wouldn’t have considered. The sellers were thrilled to get buyers who would love the home as they had, and the closing date matched up with the end of our lease.

Then, our landlady asked me to show the rental home to a person who not only was perfect for the house, but who needed furniture and bought everything we didn’t want to take with us. I could write pages about what aligned in this process, but I can only say that the numbers of mutually supportive events were profound. In the end, we were delayed in buying a home until perfect timing arranged a 15 percent drop in price, a reduced interest rate and a series of personal connections that were surprisingly satisfying as well.

Everybody involved received an experience beyond what they were expecting, which is a hallmark of mutuality in the New Living Field. You do have to initiate the process of engaging what you wish to create, but if you can relax beyond expectation, you will receive beyond imagined limitation. Whatever the struggle to release from Duality, I promise you it’s worth the effort.

July was an interesting month for me to take a break from writing this column. I found it fascinating to see how swiftly reality is shifting, and I realized how important it is to stay focused on what is coming into creation rather than what is going away. Mainstream media, in all its forms, uses drama and fear to present almost anything. It is easy to be emotionally drawn into observing an event, deciding what the outcome should be, and concluding who is right and who is wrong. The process of judgment occurs so effortlessly that we consider it normal, but it is only normal within the limited awareness fostered by Duality.

A key attribute of Duality is to compartmentalize and reject parts of the whole, and with every such judgment comes a splintering within consciousness. The reign of Duality is drawing to a close, and it’s no surprise that our primary healing work has been to recover lost aspects of self in order to restore wholeness. Living in the now, conscious convergence and “oneness” are popular subjects to readers of this magazine, but those are states of being, not goals, and are reached naturally by the process of restoring personal wholeness. We don’t just decide to be whole; we transform what is creating the splits, and that process completes over time.

What we now realize is that mind has held dominance over life and other levels of awareness, and declared itself the arbiter of truth. The end of Duality is also the end of the dominance of mind. Those who hold to strong beliefs or attempts to manipulate life through mental focus are finding themselves quite challenged, since the underlying structure supporting mental posturing is dissolving. A teaching once arose informing us to “judge not.” Why? Because judgment creates splits and feeds Duality. Judgments, separations and Duality are all interwoven and are sharing the same death.

I wrote the above to set the stage for this: Duality has been a painful experience full of distortions, and most of us are happy to see it go. But, it may be difficult to perceive where we are headed. Musing on what will happen in 2012 might be entertaining, but nobody actually knows. I have no idea what will happen tomorrow. The folly of waiting for something magical to happen in 2012 is that you are probably missing what’s here right now. The “blink of an eye” is already occurring, but know that it’s a huge eye and takes several years to blink.

The New Living Field is already present and accessible to everyone, although it takes a process to shift into it and we’re all arriving at slightly different times. In these early stages of transition I can only offer some rudimentary perceptions on life in what is variously called the New Earth, New Reality, New Consciousness, New Field, or New Matrix. There will be plenty of newness to explore for a very long time and my personal experience with the New Field is pretty basic, but I will share these initial observations:

• The New Living Field is mutual – Energy is always balanced in any exchange, so there are no concepts such as giving or receiving.
• The New Living Field responds in every moment – “Now” is the only experience, so what is needed arrives as needed, and not before. There is no thought of projecting a future based on the past.
• The New Living Field is responsive to Heart and Soul - Creation within the New Matrix is organized around fulfillment of real needs and soul desires. Authentic feeling becomes conscious, is acknowledged and open to response.
• There is no fear in the New Living Field – Fear is not real. It has no substance of its own.
• We are being rewired to interface with the New Field - Currently there are 4 new nodes augmenting the chakras and coming online in the human body/energy system.
• Beliefs have no place in the New Field - Multi-dimensional awareness and access replaces systems of thought. Mind is a processor, not a storehouse or director.
• Calmness prevails in the New Living Field – This is the peace that passes understanding. Drama ceases.

It appears that much of 2010 has a focus of dismantling how much the mind has been dominant in creating our experiences. As the grip of mind relaxes and we release further from Duality, our awareness shifts and the new operating system begins to seem more natural. This is the process of transition as old perceptions melt away. I’ll bet many of you already feel a distance between yourself and the world that used to seem so real. We’re done, done, done with that old system. It is fading. Say your goodbyes.

I have never considered myself a seeker looking for the perfect belief system or all the answers to the mysteries. I feel more like I get nudges from my soul to reconnect with who I am while continually evolving through experience. What I HAVE finally found is that the many explorations I have pursued over this and other lives have culminated in a disconnection from an old reality and movement into something brand new and totally different.

I have noted how we humans individuated and separated in Duality and became driven by fear, while growing apart from Earth as our source for life. We lost touch with our internal guidance and became externally focused and driven, widening the separation from self. Now we are restoring wholeness, pulling our energies out of the old story and opening to something profoundly original, yet we have little experience with this new reality we are entering. The story I’m sharing below may sound like a series of errors and coincidences, but my recent experiences felt to me like a validation that living in the new reality can be as effortless as predicted.

The day before Mother’s Day I heard a message from the Earth Mother asking me to relax, breathe and sync up with her. So, I did a rhythmic breathing exercise that helped me settle into feeling fully supported by this Great Mother. Much healing work in recent times has included restoration and restructuring of the root chakra and reconnecting to the earth to be directly sourced for Life. This connection seems to be the key to creation in the new system, since all manifestation on earth comes from her. It was the next day that I got this point illuminated.

I treated my mother to a concert and dinner on Mother’s Day, and it was during those events I noticed something happening. First, the parking. Free street parking is a rare commodity when multiple events are taking place downtown St. Paul, yet within a block of the theater someone was leaving a parking spot just as I was arriving. Inside the theater we discovered our seats were in the second of two rows of chairs added to an aisle space. People ahead of us blocked our view and in front of us sat a tall woman obscuring most of the stage. I wasn’t pleased, but just before curtain her young grandson decided he wanted to change chairs and they switched. Suddenly we had a full view of the stage for the entire show. As we left we wanted to connect with someone who had danced in the show and thought we may have missed her, but synchronicity connected us right at the exit.

At dinner the curious flow became even more interesting. First, a parking space was open right in front of the restaurant. Natch. Then, I couldn’t decide between two menu items so I just picked one even though the other had first attracted me. Our orders were delivered with mine missing and the server said the kitchen made the wrong sandwich but was preparing mine. After apologizing for the delay he said they’d only throw out the first one so would I like to have it at no charge. I said sure, and for free I received the sandwich I wished I had first chosen. Later, we ordered desserts. I picked something four people could easily split instead of what I felt like. The server returned with apologies to tell me they had just run out of my choice and would I like to pick something else “on the house.” I said yes, blueberry pie. In the end my meal was free and was exactly what I really wanted. Oh, and I made all the green lights on the way home.

The next day I began to realize that everything arranged according to what I was actually feeling, not what I was thinking about. I consider fulfillment of the heart’s desires to be a hallmark of the new operating system, and I felt like these events were highlighted just for my benefit.

By many accounts 2010 is said to be the year we reach a turning point in our journey from Duality into the New Matrix. If recent experiences are any indication, I can’t wait to see what Life delivers next and how it happens!

Five years ago I began the process of selling a home. My partner and I had purchased a building for our business and we needed proceeds from the sale to cover temporary financing of the new property. Days went by, then weeks passed with little buyer interest. We grew concerned as weeks became months and it became apparent that the housing market was heading downward. We let our listing expire, made some cosmetic changes to the home and eventually re-listed it with a different agent.

Again, response was so minimal that I wondered if style, quality and location really mattered since I thought we had them all, and still we waited. All together, the better part of a year passed before we received news of an offer. The offer was some distance from our asking price, but we were finally able to negotiate an agreement. Ten months for sale, one serious buyer. Still, one was all we needed.

I tell this story because of what we recognized in hindsight. The building we purchased needed more work than we expected, taking months to remodel. Our business operated out of our home and needed to continue until the building was ready. In our heads we had our plans mapped out, but rather than trusting the cues life provided, we were driven more by a nervous urgency based in money fears and “what-ifs.” Eventually we were able to see that we had been fully supported all along and that everything arranged as needed when it best served us.

We on this planet are experiencing rapid transformation of almost everything. Sometimes we explore esoteric material and think we know what is taking place, yet I expect we are seeing only a tiny part of a very large story. We might act as if we know what needs to happen, but are we really able to plan our lives or those of anyone else? Perhaps a better option is to be present as life unfolds in the moment without insisting on a clue as to where we’re headed. If we can’t see the big picture, it seems counter-productive to try controlling outcomes. I understand the fear of not knowing and the desire to control outcomes, but I’m not sure that control ever worked – and it certainly doesn’t in the new consciousness. Life is in charge, life knows the whole story and life provides what is needed in optimal timing.

Relaxing into a different way of navigating the flow seems to be the practice of the day. The new consciousness requires receptivity, not control. At first it may seem like trust, but it’s really more of a conscious relationship with creation. This new living field is responsive to needs for soul fulfillment, and the field knows what they are. Becoming receptive opens the pathways for attraction and the guidance for any action needed. The feminine first asks us to listen deeply and be receptive before proceeding into the more active steps, which seems to be a perfectly logical approach, but it has been mostly ignored in duality as forms grew out of fear and excessive needs to control outcomes.

Those of us evolving out of duality have had much to undo before moving on to our next experience. Perhaps like many of you, I have grown tired of all the processing and a bit impatient to get on with things. My human self is still challenged at times, learning to breathe its way through the changes. At least I’m now aware that I’m not in charge of the timing, because I know there is a larger story and a larger timing of which I am a part. That realization does help me to know that all is well and that I can relax out of years of feeling hyper-responsible for my experience and that of others.

Now I come full circle from the selling process that began five years ago. We are settled in our building, and have rented a house for the last four years. We are now feeling the impulse to purchase our own home and began the search several weeks ago. Our process has taught us a lot about who we are and what we need, which guides our discernment when looking at properties. I never thought that finding just the right place would be such a challenge, but you can bet I’m staying receptive even as I scour the real estate websites looking for the perfect match. I can feel Life preparing to deliver, and I’ll let you know when we need a hand with the boxes.

I recently watched a recording of 60 minutes, the CBS news program, digitally preserved for my convenience by Tivo. What caught my attention during viewing was not the content of the two stories, but my reaction to them. The topics could not have been more different, yet in both cases my eyes teared, my body relaxed and my heart experienced gratitude.

One story focused on certain discussions of the current financial collapse, and the other was about a musical savant. Both segments presented interviews with people who left me feeling moved. The commonality was the clarity and authenticity felt when in the presence of a defining moment, when the energy felt matches the words spoken. There is recognition beyond the mind when someone speaks what your body knows to be real.

We witness daily the lack of simplicity and clarity in the words of politics, business and almost any public discourse. Long-winded and excessive explanations only seem to obfuscate and misdirect, and meaningful discussion too often gives way to positioning and establishment of authority. Almost none of it feels real because the speakers are more interested in manipulating perceptions than expressing from their essence. I now find it curious to watch as entire systems in our culture struggle to function as they once did, including those connected with any kind of spirituality.

Many of us left traditional religions because we felt no resonance with what was being spoken. We became “seekers,” searching for something with a whiff of real. Yet despite all possible options, we still found ourselves within the larger framework of Duality, with choices and interpretations influenced by that matrix. This peculiar structure of consciousness generates a perception that there is something outside of ourselves that we must find, accept or believe in. We are in denial of our own natures and literally become split personalities attempting to discover what is already present but partitioned off from our awareness.

Some would say that this dualistic nature is an inherent quality of creation. You might also hear that our journey is to move beyond the density of the physical. On both points I disagree.

It is my view that the matrix of Duality is dissolving, and everything bound by that old structure is being released. Included in this dissolution are experiences of separateness and the need for beliefs. I also see a new matrix growing that is inclusive of both the physical and spiritual in a fused experience of greater embodiment. In other words, we’re not trying to get out of our bodies, we’re trying to get into them more deeply. Our bodies are changing in the process, both releasing distortions born of Duality and evolving at the cellular and DNA levels to better accommodate the greater infusion of light that deeper embodiment implies.

Most of us in this community of transformers sense the potential for significant change this year, with shoots starting to break through as early as this month. The change is not something only outside ourselves, for we are the primary vehicles of the transformation as we change from within.

Our initial task may have been healing, but soon we will step into another role intimately entwined with creation. Spiritual seeking will become non-existent as the separations dissolve and dogma loses its grip. What is real will be revealed, in schools of spirituality as well as in all other facets of our experience. Don’t expect that only the dominant religions will be challenged. Any teacher or teaching that binds those who participate may find consequence in creating attachment.

I would ask if you feel freer and less bound while following some list of rules for spiritual practice? Do you find yourself eating, dressing or acting a certain way because of a dogma that resists questioning? Do you sometimes accept explanations that sound rational but feel horrible? My suggestion is to shift attention to your feelings for guidance. Bodies know what is real in a way that minds cannot. With awareness you can notice if anyone or anything brings you ease and expansion, or tension and contraction.

I will also mention that these words are being heard by this writer. An oft-used saying is that we teach what we most need to learn. If trusting feelings is my practice for the month, I happily receive the reminder.

For me, the more we move through this process of transformation, the less easy it is to talk about it. That circumstance does provide challenge to a writer, but if words exist, I will persist.

It’s the reference that keeps shifting around, like trying to define smoke. Years ago, our reference was to things external. Addiction was a problem with a substance, a bad relationship was a problem with a person, and one’s spirituality was defined by which religion was chosen. Educational structures created a cultural mold, institutions of health care dictated the fixes for our bodies, and monetary systems defined our value to society. We were told who we were, and we lived according to whatever story we bought into. Beliefs, after all, cover a lot more territory than just discussions about God.

Our visions for a different future surfaced in the 1960s when consciousness began opening after a brutal series of 20th century wars that culminated in a blast radiating the planet. The seeds of a new field were planted, but we still made our issues about “the man” – a dualistic term used to describe whatever we thought held power over us. It took us until the 1980s to realize that we were the man as we finally began to include ourselves in the equation of our experiences.

That’s when many of us in the transformer generation began the challenging tasks of disassembling structures in consciousness that were no longer to hold power over our lives. Most of us didn’t understand that’s what we were doing, of course. Mostly we found ourselves in some form of crisis or therapy, unraveling the bindings of co-dependencies and other distortions grown in duality. It was in those disassembling processes that we began the transformative shift in earnest, and I will admit to being quite dang happy to have made it out the other side. My body grew tired, but my soul feels less bound than ever.

Still, all that personal work was only a phase of a bigger story – and now we move on.

During this past decade we have gone even deeper into the core of our beings, now realizing that this is a profound moment in the journey of consciousness. What I speak of is not about a person becoming conscious, but a momentous turning-point in the evolution of consciousness, itself. What I speak of is the matrix within which we exist and our existence within it, the whole of which is rapidly morphing into something not previously known in creation. I acknowledge the assumption in that last sentence, but I sense that the Universe doesn’t do repeats.

The current focus and our on-going process for 2010 is an alchemical fusion, merging the material and the spiritual into a new form. So, how do we describe the beings born of fusion and without separation of spirit and matter? I don’t know, but since it’s happening within our experience, I expect we’ll come up with something. Then again, “God” is merging within us to experience creation, so don’t expect much in the way of definition. If we can’t define ourselves now, I’m not expecting to have words for an expanded version of same.

Writers and teachers often use a metaphor to communicate what is beyond words to describe. Metaphors work because they reference a common experience to which we can relate. They’re like shortcuts to a level of knowing. At other times, we just repeat a belief or somebody else’s explanation when it has become presented so often that it is accepted as truth. Both techniques have limitations going forward. A lack of common experience can make metaphors ineffective, and repeating something previously repeated carries no assurance of authenticity. Plus, I am weary of platitudes and I prefer to stay as current as I can in sharing my views.

As our bodies and the earth continue to shift, events of de-creation will likely get more press than those of re-creation. My focus, however, is on our current process of fusion and eventual emergence as creator within creation.

The story is quickly growing larger, feelings are going deeper and I’m becoming convinced there are not enough superlatives in the English vocabulary to add appropriate flourish to the discussion. So, I am left with continual re-arrangement of common words to articulate what I can. Or, perhaps we need to create some new vocabulary. Our attempts may not become as ubiquitous as Google or as curious as mouse potato or soul patch, but there could be satisfaction in adding to the English lexicon before language finally goes completely out of style.

I’m open to confabulation.

This morning I found myself reflecting on personal experiences lived over the past 30 years. Or so. I can now say that fully half my life has been spent actively engaging in the large-scale change of consciousness I agreed to assist before I arrived.

A large group of baby boomers came in as transforming agents, and I dutifully took on my part and those structures within consciousness that were mine to transmute. I didn’t always know I was doing such work, of course, but I can finally see the effects we have had within the whole of humanity. It would appear that breakdowns of long-established institutions of manipulation and control are now gaining momentum, and I give my compatriots a collective high-five for a job well done. However, I’m still holding off on scheduling the big party because we have a teensy way to go before our full intentions have been realized.

Each of us in this group of change agents had our own chunk of the grand distortions to work with and appropriate triggers to kick-start us into the process. The part within consciousness that I chose to heal (transform) expressed itself through a debilitating chronic fatigue and depression so heavy that only a persistent will could effect any movement. I found myself engaged in psychotherapy, channeling, alternative healing modalities, whole-food cooking classes, psychic development, a men’s group, hands-on-healing training, various explorations in consciousness and more reading and discussion sessions than I’ve had before or since. I would expect that some of these activities ring familiar to many other boomers, and I also expect you are as happy as I am about completing those legs of the journey. While immersed in our processes, we thought we just had to get through our painful little somethings so we could get back to our “normal” life. Ha ha. Nope.

As I progressed through the various stages of healing, my manifest reality also began to shift, bringing a painful process of divorce, a complete job change, physically moving several times and ultimately landing in a life where my more apparent work, as it were, is all about change, healing and transformation. This time around I’m more conscious about what I’m really up to, and that feels like a calming relief in whatever process I find myself.

After all this time I can finally grasp that transforming means to change form, and that the biggest challenge at any point along the path has been clinging to a known factor out of a fear that the unknown will bring suffering or death. Now, if something is so uncomfortable in life that one is manifesting depression and debilitating physical experiences, wouldn’t one usually want to change things as quickly as possible? I’m tempted to say “duh,” but I’m writing about myself and I’ve learned that logic is not always guiding the choice.

Fear sucks. Literally. It sucks the Life from our lives for no purpose other than to maintain its own existence. It is an energetic leech that is totally made up of nothing. Fear seems all powerful when we’re in its spin, yet fear has no essential nature. It is not real. The sages have said so, but minds develop strong beliefs that create contractions we name fear and are reluctant to release when faced with emotions, feelings and anything else that can’t be neatly defined, categorized or compartmentalized.

Mind has refused to value things it considers intangible, claiming they are not of substance. What if believing that perspective has been one of our largest bindings? I suspect we are about to entertain a realization that beliefs are actually the intangible items of no substance and what is real are things often discounted as unimportant or even detrimental to life.

We have faced many challenges on our journeys of transformation, but the next round may be the most challenging: surrendering the belief that mind is superior to matter. Getting thrown off that horse may prove to be a painful experience, but it doesn’t have to be. We have already learned from a lifetime of making changes that giving fear any power only prolongs the agony. This time, take a moment to remember the truth about fear when you are challenged to let go of your need to dictate how you think your personal life should function.

Life and the new Living Field are present to help you manifest the deepest desires of your heart and soul, even if you are unable to name them. 2010 is purported to be a year of shifting out of mental dominance and going deeper within to re-establish connection with Living Wisdom. Trust the substantial nature of Life to guide you through the changes and bring full support and everything you need for fulfillment. Once you move past trust into natural receptivity I sense that you will discover the real meaning of freedom. And by you, I mean me, too.

Then, we can party.

A decade ago we were concerned about Y2K and the end of the world as we knew it. Perhaps we were right about the outcome, even though Y2K itself turned out to be a minor event for most people. Still, that possibility of radical change did ignite an awareness of our global interconnectedness and the possibility that our lives could experience significant shift in a short period of time.

However, instead of a global meltdown at that time, we actually experienced 24 hours of collective joy. Do you remember watching television as we transitioned from 1999 into the year 2000? Fireworks displays and millennium events cascaded past our eyes as people in each time zone celebrated the midnight hour and the beginning of a new cycle.

Often the significant story can be missed when we are focused on the popular one. Y2K made for months of speculative drama while the new year’s celebrations were over in 24 hours. Which story do you remember getting the most press? I’m going with Y2K. Yet, which experience was more significant for you personally? I’ll bet it was the millennial celebration. Y2K was based in fear, while the grand, planetary new year’s experience was a joyful party shared by billions. In terms of the evolution of consciousness, that moment of shared joy did more than most people realized to lay the groundwork for a new earth experience. Why? Because the sustained joy lifted the collective frequencies long enough for the new template to stabilize. That stability meant that we could accelerate our transformation process without the same intensity of highs and lows as before. And, accelerate we did as the matrix of time further collapsed in each succeeding year.

2010 is slated to bring us another bump on the scale of significance. A decade after Y2K we find ourselves enveloped by a new phase of our transformation, and once again the authors in the mainstream are likely to focus on the superficial while never seeing the greater story. The greater story is our reconnection to the deep wisdom of the feminine, including the dismantling of what has kept us from making that connection. This next phase is where more of the old reality comes apart. Structures within consciousness that have dominated and suppressed the feminine are up for dissolution, and without them we can more easily find our way to go within to listen at the level now required.

The operating system of consciousness is changing. There are teachings galore created by minds that have told us that we only need to believe something, or repeat something, or attempt to steer energy around with our mind to create our reality. I see such teachings as being generated from and intended for the old system that is dying, and I find those teachings generally irrelevant, if not downright misleading in the context of the world that is birthing. Creation in the old world may have been perceived to be a case of mind over matter, but that dominance does not exist in the non-dual world.

Creation within the new consciousness fused of Spirit and Matter is produced by Life as it brings into experience the soul’s deepest desires. This is a wordy way of saying that creating in the new reality begins with deep listening to the feminine, or mystery, which is why we will now move into a time of learning how to do that. The footings for what is to be created next will be found by reaching down and in, not up and out.

Revisiting the experiences of that Y2K year reminded me that we are creative beings capable of changing our experiences when needed, and that sometimes we allow our attention to be misdirected by drama and the angst that drives it. Unlike ten years ago, we have now established the foundation of a new world in which we can choose to consciously create who we are in form.

We can enter at any time, but we will have to check all fears and beliefs at the door. Don’t worry, you won’t need them back, and the management will gladly recycle them for you.

It is now three years until December of 2012, and no matter your beliefs about that date you are probably feeling the acceleration of change. I would have written exhilaration, but that may not be how you see it, given the wild ride these past months.

If you consider yourself a person who is moving into the new experience on earth, you’re already familiar with the challenges of re-making your life during this transition. Unknown to most people is the extra thrust of attention we’ve been receiving from those in Spirit who are assisting the transformation. At Lightsmith, we learned in September that the coming years are now expected to bring more intensity than was originally hoped for by the masters guiding the plan. Much of humanity has been unwilling to release from numerous illusions, so a little extra assistance is on the way. I suppose it’s like those times in my life when I haven’t taken either the first, second or third hint, so I receive a boot to the rear to get my attention.

People who are more consciously making the move out of the matrix of Duality have been nudged along at a quickening pace for several weeks. Why? Because it’s easier to make the shift now in a time of relative stability, and a larger group is needed to stabilize and grow the new field while the old structures continue their collapse. Also needed during the larger transition are oases of calm, understanding and guidance for what is taking place. What has been learned about making this transition will soon be a welcomed resource by the next wave of people who find their world changing in sudden and unexpected ways.

What will be of great value are people who are able to stay out of drama, who can maintain clarity amid chaos, and who understand that love knows the way. Some of those who will exhibit such qualities are the people now being prompted into greater personal alignment and deeper embodiment of self. It is difficult to be a guide if you haven’t made the trip yourself.

Right now the energies are calling people into alignment, a process of bringing your self to yourself. Alignment means discerning on deep levels what fits for you going forward and what doesn’t. Alignment is acting on what you know is true for yourself, not what others proclaim is true for you. Alignment prompts you to deal with things in your life that don’t work and have been avoided. Alignment is a prerequisite for greater embodiment, because more of you can not enter this experience when you are not authentic. Coming into alignment means dropping the lifeless and choosing life, which has its challenges when we’ve had so much practice listening to everybody but ourselves.

The challenges to humanity are about to increase in magnitude, because now is the time of choosing to move into alignment – or not. Hints one, two and three have already been given, and you know what comes next. While seemingly harsh, I invite you to draw upon your own memory of what it took to move you out of your conditioned comfort zone and onto a new path. Did you make your needed changes willingly or were you confronted with circumstances that ultimately gave you few pleasant options? Our conditioning by fear has been long, strong and deep, and prompting the process of fundamental change large scale may take some large-scale jolts.

I see ahead of us the liberation of spirit we have been working toward all along. The transition is challenging, but the outcome is worth it all. You may have noticed that I don’t write in flowery prose about our future, but that doesn’t mean I am not in awe at what is taking place.

We are becoming that which we have envisioned, although the process may be different than we imagined. I’m betting that the future is also quite different than we have imagined, so I offer no pictures of what we may find there. All I know is that for right now it is important to stay in one’s own process of coming into alignment while the larger process of dissolving melts the illusion around us. Now you see it, now you don’t. Or is it the other way around?

I’m wondering what goes through the mind of a caterpillar as it turns to mush in the chrysalis. No longer a caterpillar, not yet a butterfly. I don’t mean to overwork a cliché, but the metaphor is apt as I sit on the cusp of my 61st year and my second life this time around.

From the outside my days appear to continue as before, but on the inside I have surely entered a state even I don’t recognize. The contrast in experience between my previous six decades and this moment is striking as my mind continues to surrender what it cannot grasp. We have been talking about transforming for so long that it’s easy to forget we’re actually doing so. Perhaps the difference between us and a caterpillar is that we can observe our own process, although I’m wondering if perhaps our emergence doesn’t come until we stop doing so.

Dissolve, Re-group, Re-birth. That is our cycle, and we now engage the process on a large scale as well as individually. We are changing not only our personal structures but also the very fabric in which we perceive our existence. The fabric is the web, the matrix within which we hold all thought, form and experience. It is the field of consciousness that informs our lives and determines how energy flows. The New Matrix is the one we awaken into when we emerge transformed after the dissolution of Duality and the reordering of the cells.

Some spiritual systems teach of the necessity of leaving a material experience to be liberated, claiming our true nature is spirit. Other teachings offer a similar theme of finding our home in heaven after a life of sacrifice and suffering. At the same time, we are taught that the universe has a dual nature – that somewhere out there is a God that decides our experiences. Observe, however, that virtually all of our spiritual teachings have arisen from within the matrix of consciousness we named Duality. It is the defining qualities of the Duality field to split awareness and polarize the energies, so from within that system we may deduce that this is the way of the universe. If perceptions of reality are influenced by the matrix in which we are immersed, then from within Duality we determine that we must move beyond a material existence to experience a non-dual state. But, what if that is not so?

Perhaps a big challenge of this transformation process is releasing old structures that limit experiences of transition. Minds struggle in these times because they became convinced of the superiority of their well-reasoned beliefs, ignoring input they cannot process. If all experience must pass through the mind to be valid, then a large percentage of experience is ignored. So much for feelings, intuition, psychic awareness, emotions or any other level of direct communication. Minds like data, and most everything else does not compute. This realization presents a choice of either relaxing the mind or further closing it. Each choice has consequence, which seems appropriate given the concept of free will.

With the dissolution of Duality comes the release of almost all things born of that reality. Most every crisis and breakdown observed today can be seen as energy exiting from institutions, governments, systems, religions, beliefs, and all structures within consciousness that were built upon the framework of the old story. In contrast, a New Matrix is present with the promise of different structures and experiences. The New Matrix is non-dual. Energies don’t polarize, fear is not real, and Wholeness is a defining quality of the experience. And, you don’t have to physically die to transition, although there is certainly a death to an old reality.

The mind holds the key to making the transition. The catch is that the mind has to release its hold on what it perceives is real and relax into the flow of a process much larger than itself. Information and analysis may take you to the threshold of the new earth experience, but knowledge does not open the door.

At this point there may be a crisis of mind, a choice to surrender to the bigger story in motion and an opportunity to voluntarily enter the chrysalis. My mind is definitely going to goo. I don’t know how it will re-form, but I can feel plenty of activity behind the scenes. I anticipate my own emergence out the other side, and I definitely look forward to watching all of us bursting out of our old shells, creating a whole new living experience of who we are.

For this writer, today is 09-09-09, and I just returned from a much-appreciated vacation away from the routines connected with running one’s own business. For many in the New Age community, today was purported to represent another major moment in our grand adventure of personal and planetary transformation. Perhaps the numbers representing this date do mean something beyond a poetic interpretation of our times, but as planetary work goes I guess I’m still on vacation since I have felt no impulse of energy moving me beyond my routine. In fact, I’m surprised at the stillness given the amount of astrological and channeled material speaking to the significance of this configuration of digits.

Today I’m feeling like my life is rather normal, whatever that is, instead of being immersed in a process only certain compatriots might understand. The intensity of deep, personal transformative work seems to have waned, and some part of me feels done. I’m feeling ready for a personal shift with the mystery yet to be revealed. My recent days spent far away from home altered my daily rhythm and served to pull me out of a habitual way of seeing only through the lens of being part of the change I want to see, or any other pithy aphorism that comes to mind.

I have finally achieved peacefulness from the eons-long process I have undertaken to arrive at this moment. The experience to date has been large, taxing, full and painful at times, and I’m sensing that beyond this resting point I will begin feeling the urge to move on. If we are all players on a stage, I have closed the last show of an old story and I’m taking a breather before diving in to a new production. I’m counting on the playwright to come up with an interesting plot and to give me some good lines. Oh, wait, the playwright is me. I hope I know what I’m doing.

Even reflecting on just this one life brings amazement at how much I have been through and managed to transform. I am finally able to appreciate the need for the experiences I have had, and I can see what a stunning amount of transformation has been accomplished by all of us who have been participants in the story. I won’t say I feel abundant gratitude for the full depth of struggle endured, but I do hold a sense of appreciation for the process of soul growth bringing us to this moment. The birthing of a new reality is bringing new challenges, but certainly not the kind we have learned to negotiate.

If you are a Baby Boomer like me, you have spent your entire life healing and shifting structures of consciousness on behalf of yourself and the whole. We were the transformers, dismantling the old to make way for the new. Perhaps the current challenge is not one of more healing and transmuting but re-learning how to be a creator. The skill set we grew for dismantling and working our way through the darkest of times is likely to be of less benefit going forward.

This moment in our evolution offers a special opportunity for those who choose it. We can die to a previous life and re-enter another without leaving the body. If you have been feeling an undefinable grief you may be in the process of making the transition. Saying goodbye to what has been familiar and meaningful brings emotion, even when saying goodbye to something that has been painful. We have long been in a phase of our journey marked by forgetfulness. We forgot that we have been through many experiences of life, some lived in joy, flow and endless creation with others offering heavy challenges. The descent into density may have been necessary, but it hasn’t been fun.

A new story now debuts and it brings experiences of fresh creation and wonder. The promise of a life without struggle doesn’t mean we won’t be active; it just means we can drop our old sense of drudgery and efforting. Such a shift may take some adjustment for this old Baby Boomer, but I’m certainly willing to give it a go. I’ll be ready any time now, but forgive me if first I spend just a little more time pausing to reflect.

I once knew of a respected visionary who articulated a concept about how people in the future would gather together. Details escape me, but I seem to remember something about being grouped in threes and creating overlapping circles. Soon I was reading about workshops designed to teach people how to gather in threes and create overlapping circles.

I’m stretching the story a bit, but you get the drift. This person had a glimpse of a possible future and set about trying to make it happen. People came together based on respect for the visionary, but the groups dissipated when the energy wasn’t sustainable to continue meeting in a foreign and unsatisfying structure. This way of gathering was not yet being moved into existence by creation, so an externally imposed agenda created expectations that could not be fulfilled.

In this case, an idea took dominance over a natural order of progression. It’s a little like trying to be born a fully functioning adult without the developmental stages necessary to actually reach the outcome. Visions are senses of possibility, not blueprints for goals to be reached.

I have been observing a trend in the recent energies of our transformation, and possibly a similar tendency to shortcut the process. There is a growing desire among many of us to be together with others, possibly in new structures or forms. I interpret this as a sign of our shift out of duality and its illusions of separation. We’re tired of feeling alone, and long for genuine communion and creative interaction. We’re also tired of turning ourselves into commodities for consumption, hence a fatigue from an over-abundance of “expos.” We’re not sure what new forms may be trying to birth, but we’re recognizing a deep desire for some kind of fundamental shift in relationships with each other. Herein lies potential and the need to honor a process in motion.

Community arises. It is an ever-evolving organism. It is not up to the mind to decide what constitutes community and attempt to make it so. My experience with “intentional” community leads me to avoid participation in something that puts behavioral expectations on me. I once lived in cooperative housing created by sensitive creative types who nonetheless expected attendance at mandatory meetings, committee assignments and adherence to Robert’s Rules of Order. Since the very governing structure was the antithesis of the creative process, it was not a complete surprise that a dysfunctional autocracy still managed to express itself in endless drama and control. For me, the growing heaviness of my experience became the push for me to leave. Sure, it was all perfect, yadda yadda, but still I have no desire to show up ever again where dogma is valued over essence.

Certain memes (cultural concepts) get passed along through the new-age grapevine, just as in other facets of our world. We might come across a certain channeling or astrology reading that observes us moving into a time when we will come together in communities and be more co-creative. This is a vision, or reading, of the energies in motion. Sensitive types may feel the energy of this impulse, and suddenly the idea is spreading that we’re now supposed to be co-creative in communities. Pretty soon someone is posting a notice that says it’s time to be in communities and be co-creative, so let’s get a group together at 7 p.m. on Friday and co-create. Sounds a lot like the idea in the first paragraph, no?

Now, please don’t think I wish to dissuade anyone who wishes to create gatherings. In fact, I will be among those doing so. I only offer caution to avoid letting the mind attempt to dictate the experience, setting agendas and trying the control the outcome of what is an organic process. Mental dominance, by definition, is not co-creative, so it’s no surprise that the new field does not support such attempts at dictating what is to be. You could begin by calling together people who share a common interest in addition to their spiritual credentials. How about inviting people who love to cook, or love to create art, or love to entertain others, or perhaps just want to socialize with others who share a similar path. Hang out together and see what shows up. Not everything has to be about “spirituality.” I’m just sayin’.

We have no idea what is coming as one world dissipates and another takes the stage. We are creating ourselves anew, and we have no reference from past experiences for what creation wishes to birth through us now. There is no way to know, so save your energy trying to figure it out.

The slate is wiped clean for everyone, and the most-needed practice right now is to listen. Everything else will proceed from those impulses as we come together and share who we are. No predictions, dogma or agendas needed. Just us.

Holy moly, welcome to August already and the on-going, ever-morphing energies of 2009. The late spring and early summer energies were pushy, demanding, relentless, unequivocal and challenging on multiple levels. I hesitate to say were, since plenty of challenges remain, but at least I’m starting to feel like things are moving into my life again. I would say that I’m finally having an energetic thaw in terms of feeling enough energy moving to get me off my recliner, but now that I’m up I tend to space off almost everything as soon as I get distracted by the next loud noise or pretty color.

This is progress? Perhaps the upside is I also space off any memory of the screw-up from the previous spacing off, so at least I have that going for me. I also have noticed that I focus most easily on fun and interesting things (and pretty colors and loud noises), and everything else has reached a new level of drudgery.

As I write this we have only finished one week of July, but our move into summer brings a new phase of our transformation, and we are definitely engaged in the process. One hallmark of the spring phase was a lack of interest in almost anything. Maybe we did what we had to do, but enthusiasm and focus was hard to come by for many of us. A quality of this new phase is feeling like we’re somewhere between worlds with not so much attachment to the old ways, but not much clarity about where we’re headed.

The geek in me would say that we’re installing the beta version of the new operating system, and I’m sure we’ll feel better when the first version is officially is released. Then again, where we’re headed is consciously creative not unconsciously reactive, so we have no need to reference anything beyond the infamous moment. So, time goes away. You may have noticed its recession.

People in the vanguard of this transition continue to do deep work accompanied by some major rewiring. At Lightsmith we’re using the word fusion to describe how various parts are coming together to create new forms. As one example, we see changes and fusion in the chakra system creating new nodes that are part of an operating system “upgrade.” Who knows what is next or what the merged hu-man is to fully become.

In my view, the intention within consciousness has always been to evolve a body in which a more full presence of soul could be merged. This is the essence of metaphors such as the creation of heaven on earth. It has never been about something happening outside us, but is about what we are becoming. I see that merger as the core activity of these times, which leads to our numerous processes of releasing what doesn’t compute in the new system.

We can’t take with us into our new experience anything not belonging to us or not of Essence. All our healing work has been clearing the way for something new to be. As soul and body fuse more deeply, our physical self rises to meet spirit. Some call it ascension, but soul embodiment works as well, since there is also a descending of spirit into form.

I see two realities on earth right now with different operating systems running. One is old and disassembling (just watch the news) and one is new and growing in presence every day, though less visible on the surface. The choice is which one to live within. I have been “politely” told more than once that it is good to have a vision of what can be, but that I must deal with reality. I am dealing with reality, which for me is choosing to participate in the world that is birthing, not the one that is dying. As I see it, the new operating system is established, real and accessible and available for all who choose it. This is The Edge, and that is where we now find ourselves.

Some of us spent years exploring whatever spiritual pathway drew our attention, trying to find something that answered our questions or matched what we were feeling. We may have shifted focus several times as we continued to grow past the limiting dogma of any particular practice. In my case, I left behind a typical religious upbringing as soon as I could. I found channeling, psychic development and training in energy healing and consciousness were better fits for me.

There’s a bigger story that gets lost in all the personal searching, with books, lectures and classes high on the list of pursuits, but at some point, we sense that we are part of something larger. I’m not talking about only remembering that we are aspects of Source, but realizing that we have been participating in a kind of collective experiment designed to create a new reality. Through our personal journeys we have been healing and transforming much more than ourselves. We have also been acting on behalf of the whole, for every shift in ourselves is a shift in the hologram of consciousness within which we exist. Healing is really an act of dismantling old structures and replacing them with something new. To paraphrase Gandhi, we are becoming the change we wish to see in the world.

Our soul has guided us through this journey, always aware of the bigger picture. Along the way we may have found plenty of philosophies and words to digest and debate, but that’s mostly a function of the mind attempting to make sense of something larger than it can grasp. The thought about something is not the same as the experience of something, so a philosophical argument is mostly a mental exercise. It is not real. The real experience in such a discussion is usually tension in the body for those participating or sometimes a liberation of stuck energy when insights lead to a shift in perspective.

As we move into the energies of the New Field, thinking gives way to experiencing and seeking gives way to creating. Our deepest desires are for experiences, not just more information. We can’t think our way into this new reality, but we can call it into our experience. Perhaps you have noticed certain changes in yourself these past weeks, like the glow down low, that sense of something astir in the Root and Pelvic areas? This pulsing in the Root and Pelvic Chakras is life, creation at work. Our understanding of this creation energy has been limited and we’ve been told it was for procreation, even then with severe limitations imposed. What if we are expanding our creative possibilities from essential acts of procreation to delicious acts of co-creation? What if we get to experience magnificent ripples of pleasure just from the sheer act of creating with others, free of dogma. Count me in.

Have you begun to feel an expansion in your chest of a heart that strains for release into the world? Do you find yourself more deeply connected with those who are around you, with a love that not only ignores differences but gratefully cherishes the unique qualities of another? Have you recently felt like crying for no clear reason, but with a deep knowing that all is well? More light streaming in gives us a much deeper experience of Love. I believe we ain’t seen nothin’ yet.

And have you begun to notice how certain things have arranged for you with almost no effort on your part? Did you catch yourself at some point going “wow” about an experience because it was so unexpected or meaningful that you had no other words? This is the New Field at work. If a gushing waterfall is our future flow, I would say that we have barely seen the vapors of the first drop.

And finally, a peeve. There are schools of thought that dis the material world as inferior, illusionary or unreal. Please understand my point of view: I believe those teachings are missing Mr. Huge Point. That point would be the one that sees the plan of creation as one designing a materialized form through which Creator could experience its creations. Start with the thought of it (Light), come up with a plan to create a densification into matter (Life), then merge the two in a form that can deeply feel and experience. What do you end up with?

Us.

I recently heard from the mother of a newborn that her baby was considered underweight because her pediatrician’s statistic tables didn’t match her child’s reality. I joked that her child had her first opportunity to practice not living up to the expectations of others.

The mother returned the humor, asking where was I when she was growing up and I, at twice her age, responded that I’d only resolved the issue for myself a week ago and was now free to talk about it. In truth, I’m not sure I have completely purged that old training that I am responsible for the experience of others, but I’m definitely working the recovery steps.

As I write these words I am reflecting on my 1950′s childhood and the pervasive cultural messages. TV shows such as “Leave it to Beaver” and “Father Knows Best” projected the image of correct behavior, with unpleasant consequences (but eventual salvation) for straying off course. Religion declared me imperfect, asked for my time and money to perpetuate the message, and informed me that sacrificing myself for the benefit of others was the proper choice. Benefits to me seemed made of fuzzy promises without much clarification.

The weight of external expectations from parents, schools and peers was intensified by my belief that almost anyone carried more authority than I did, and like a well-trained soldier I delivered without questioning. This pattern of behavior continued into adulthood with me subduing my own senses for the sake of those who might feel challenged by a differing viewpoint, with conflict avoidance high on my list of personal priorities.

My journey has unique qualities to be sure, but many experiences are similar in our collective pasts, including the ways we learned to be someone for someone else. The repression of honest emotion and true expression creates a festering swirl in the dark corners of the unconscious, which eventually will demand attention. If not uncapped with awareness, the releases can be twisted and frightful. Many people recently became concerned that a virus would wreak havoc on humanity, but pandemic can also refer to a general large-scale fear. I’m thinking there are pandemics galore, unrecognized for their sheer numbers like missing the forest for the trees, and all that.

My path of healing has been a relatively gentle one, but these days we are witnessing more of what happens when the lid comes off without awareness. Our planet is undergoing a shift both expected and impossible to control. Healing (a restoration of wholeness) cannot take place while anything remains in the shadows, since all aspects of who we are must be included. What has been repressed is rising, and we sometimes see horrific actions as the fetid energies burst from their containment.

Fortunately, the shifts bring with them new potential. A change of consciousness opens an opportunity to re-frame meanings, because our perception shifts as a result of the change. For example, in the old story of living up to others’ expectations we were taught to be of service in a particular way, usually illustrated by giving of one’s energy for a cause. Give your time, give your money, give your life. To be clear, I am not speaking of voluntary actions that feed our souls, but rather the agendas born of systems that demand we set aside our beings for the sake of behaviors designed to support the system.

In the old story of duality, our consciousness gets split into self/other. The shift we are making is creating a new experience for us. In the old story, integrity is seen as how well we live up to expected moral or ethical principles decided by another. In the new story, integrity is about authentically expressing ourselves from the core of our true being. We may hold a memory of what this expression feels like from our experiences in the world of spirit, but we are now creating the possibility of such experiences in a material world. To me, that’s a magnificent achievement.

Service takes on a different meaning in the new story, because we are no longer focused on meeting external demands. It has been said that the greatest gift we can give is the gift of ourselves, and I would say that in the new reality that statement is precisely true. Perhaps the greatest service we can offer each other these days is to continue moving into greater alignment with our own souls and expressing the gift of ourselves into the world.

Back in the 1980s I found myself squeezing my way through the narrow aisles of the Bodhi Tree Bookstore in West Hollywood, California. Known for its extensive selection of books about things spiritual, the little shop was the place to troll for must-have reading material. I was on the alert for what I thought “should” be in my library, even if I wasn’t much interested in the subject. My collection of books grew over time, but languished on my bookshelf for years, many unread, and eventually I realized that few of the classic teachings spoke to me.

Perhaps I had learned what I needed in a previous life, or perhaps the messages had become irrelevant to me, I didn’t know. What I do remember is being bored with long, deep explanations of things that seemed aimed at educating my mind but never seemed to touch my life. What I was reading had no more aliveness for me than the dry lessons of my Christian youth, no matter what culture or what revered teacher was being represented. In my view, philosophies tend to entertain the mind and teachers aren’t meant to be worshipped.

For all the words with which I surrounded myself, I gained no satisfaction save the notion that I had a book collection worthy of a serious seeker. Too serious. Eventually I boxed up most of my books and, not without irony, shipped them off to the Bodhi Tree where they were sold in their used book store.

I am a baby boomer, and I share a certain story with my compatriots. A good number of us have spent the past 30 years or more in a slow unraveling and revealing. The unraveling often begins in crisis and continues to the revelation. Then we repeat the process. One would think we’re a slow bunch, but we’ve really just had a lot to do. Many are the pathways, and eventually we find ourselves on one that matches us.

I can now know gratitude for my earlier years of debilitating depression and for the psychologist I found to assist. Turns out that the traditional aspect of her therapy was of little help, but the deeper awareness of this therapist showed up at my first session. She asked me to read a book, and so I did. That book was The Nature of Personal Reality by Seth, as channeled by Jane Roberts. Finally, something spoke to me and my pathway opened. Natasha, I don’t know where you are, but my heart and soul thank you for your unconventional guidance. I also acknowledge that my awareness of channeling then opened my path to eventually intersect with that of Michele Mayama. For that I am profoundly grateful.

My predilections took me in the direction of consciousness, not necessarily toward the academic, but as a techie curious about the workings of an evolving universal structure within which creation comes to be. I say “evolving,” because in my view the structure is changing. In other words, we are not only awakening or becoming conscious, we are also changing what we are waking up within.

Some teachings prefer to relegate matter (and bodies) to an inferior status. I would say that the evolution of a material body with an emotional component has been a Divine plan for fusing Spirit within a physical experience. Similar teachings would say that we are ascending into light or becoming some nebulous oneness. I would say that there is a vibrational ascension of Matter and Life, and a simultaneous descending of Spirit and Light, creating an alchemical fusion into a new form. We could call this new form Living Light.

There also exist teachings of salvation in the form of someone coming; Jesus, Maitreya, ETs, or others we name superior in some way. I would echo the Hopi Indians who say that we are the ones we have been waiting for.

We are the ones who have been releasing old structures of consciousness through our processes of healing and coming into alignment. We are the ones who are embodying greater aspects of soul as we recover lost fragments of self and fuse more deeply into Life. We are the ones dissolving the past so that living in the now becomes possible, and more than a mantra. We are the ones who, through our willingness to enter and transmute a vast karmic story, are now becoming something that has never before been in existence. We are Creator, becoming conscious within Creation. This is no small thing.

And this is all happening here. And now.

“Strange fascination, fascinating me
Ah changes are taking the pace I’m going through”

So I turned myself to face me…
Just gonna have to be a different man” – David Bowie, excerpts from “Changes”

Oh, man are we going through some stuff as deep, rapid, fundamental changes demand our attention. Did I mention relentless? You’re probably not so surprised because we’ve been talking about these things for years, but your experience might be different than imagined. I’ll bet you didn’t know how much fear was programmed into your system until it started coming out.

Why is this transition to a more desirable experience so challenging? Perhaps because we continue to bump up against the places where we have become crystallized. We have this vast creation that continually changes form and a soul path that is part of a very long story, yet somehow we manage to get so absorbed with a version of reality that we grip onto it like nothing else exists. Life zigs while we zag, and we decide Life is the problem. Seems, well, delusional. Like an addiction, we stay attached to something that is not in our best interest, unwilling to explore the binding that lurks under the surface of awareness. This is the basic fear of letting go.

Considering our experiences in lifetimes of duality-based experiences, I completely understand how fear injected us with patterns of disfunction. In techie-speak I might call these patterns plug-ins. As Duality dissolves and we install our new programs, those old plug-ins only serve to crash the system. They must be uninstalled. Right now there are a ton of plug-ins being uninstalled, so if you’re tired and feel a bit stuck in place at the moment, know that something happening at another level needs your energy.

Minds are also challenged by this transition. We can’t think our way through it, which is a bit of an issue when minds have assumed they can control outcomes. They don’t, but the illusion that they do is powerful. That illusion also is melting down along with everything else unreal; often the main impediment to change is the mind’s reluctance to let go.

As I see it, the dissolution of our own “plug-ins” is the process calling for attention. What is taking place in the outer world is just demonstrating the same dissolution elsewhere. My advice? Do what is yours to do. You have a good deal of support, and so does everybody else.

The old story does not want to die, and it will do everything it can to keep you bound. Fear is the mechanism employed to bind, while self-distraction is the habit of avoiding the fear. Where your attention is will inform you whether you are facing and releasing the fears – or keeping yourself otherwise occupied. Are you enmeshed in the drama of the outside world, or are you immersed in your process of transformation? If you have ever left a relationship that you knew wasn’t a match for you after much futility of trying to make it work, you have awareness of the challenges of making a choice to move beyond what you have known.

There is an amping up of Duality as it seeks to remain viable. “New agers” are not exempt from turning their focus away from their own processes and being drawn into one drama or another. The clue? When attention shifts to something external that must be fixed or exposed, or something external that promises salvation. Yes, we are sometimes called to assist this transformation on behalf of the whole, but that guidance comes from within and the process unfolds organically. For me, the presence of an agenda is usually a red flag.

Despite the turmoil in a world being challenged to re-imagine itself, I remain quite at peace and confident that this process of change will be short-lived on the scale of human transitions. I also feel fully supported by beings of heaven and earth. If my mind ever rises up in protest, I use a little self-talk based on what I have learned about the bigger story. It might go something like this:

The planet is alive and embodied by a magnificent being of consciousness. She and those who assist Her are facilitating and informing the process.

Some aspects of consciousness took dominance during the reign of duality. By design, that dominance is not possible in the new reality.

Illusions are dissolving, including the money trance.

Money is not a substitute for life. Everything real exists without it.

Fear shifts the focus to something external demanding your attention. Deal with the fear, not the externalization.

Recreation is re-creation. Recreate.

Turning within is vital. Pay attention.

We are here by choice at this time. Remember why you chose.

Breathe. All is well.

My first thought when preparing to write this column was to offer my congratulations to Tim Miejan and Cathy Jacobsen on their purchase of this publication. I have known The Edge almost since it began early in the ’90s, and I believe it has outlived almost every other free paper on Twin Cities newsstands. That fact alone speaks clearly about the interest in the subject matter of the paper and the service being performed by its existence

I will also be honest about my experience with The Edge these past few years: I stopped reading it. I felt like I was moving at a different pace and the words I read no longer spoke to me. I wondered if some day that would change. Well, the Universe works in mysterious ways and I now find myself writing this column. Which, I might add, makes it a teensy bit awkward to grouse about what I am reading. That said, I’ll let you know that I am very happy to be included in the rebirth of this magazine.

Seems appropriate that the new incarnation of The Edge launches in March, the movement into spring and a time of new beginnings. The equinox gently saunters in at 11:44 (UTC) on Friday March 20. Hey, did you know that UTC stands for Coordinated Universal Time? I like that idea, although I’m probably thinking of it differently than whoever came up with it. Anyway, as I was leading up to, 11 and 44 are two of the notable master numbers in numerologyland. Depending on interpretation (mine, in this case) a person could say that this is the time of birthing and anchoring something new as the foundation for our new lives – with a little magic thrown in. You probably already know that 2009 is an 11 year, so the whole process gets some extra amperage.

The original concept for this publication was to reflect on the evolution of consciousness. For me that’s a story larger than what is contained in the notion of spirituality. As I see it, our story is no longer about what it means to accept that we explore by different pathways, but what happens at the end of the path. The Mayans mapped this evolution, and their pathway ends in 2012. After that we appear to be charting new territory. To be clear, though, I would suggest that 2012 is just a number to reference a state of transition, and that we’re already in it.

My sense is that many old teachings will now lose energy and dissolve, especially if they aren’t truly assisting people to move beyond them. Dogma has had its day, whether traditionally religious, new age or otherwise. We are moving beyond the binding structures born of the old world and are freeing ourselves to move into a newly created world. We are leaving behind, with some grief, all that is no longer needed for what lies ahead. And, we have prepared a fertile ground from all that we have released and plowed under, recycling old energy for use in a new creation. I believe we are ready.

I expect great things from this new spring season, and I can hardly wait to see what begins to sprout from all we have planted. As I write this in early February I’ve been without a sense of movement for many weeks. It has felt like somewhere off in the distance things are swirling all around me, yet I’m being kept out of the loop. Sure, I’ve been busy in a day-to-day routine, but without any sense of what is coming. Some part of me has wondered if inspiration would ever return, but I know it will, and just taking a moment to acknowledge that a new season is upon us has been a gentle reminder to myself. And so, I breathe.

I know there is chaos in the other world but that’s just energy releasing from where it has been bound in old forms, making itself available for something new. As we enter the next phase of our amazing journey, my suggestion is to keep an eye on what is rising from the earth, not on what is being plowed under.

I have some pet peeves, things that send me up a wall, rub me the wrong way, turn my crank and tan my hide – like over-used sayings and cliches, often regurgitated without a second thought. An example? How about: "It is better to give than to receive." I am aware of the origins of this concept and the power it has held over people, but I just don’t happen to believe it is truth. It has always felt like misdirection promoted by somebody with an agenda, or passed along in a way that creates a binding through expectation.

Thanks to this program running in our systems, we became good at giving up our energy without developing a similar ability to receive. As I see it, that old program is up for deletion as we enter into the new reality, because the ability to receive is directly related to creating within that new system. Receptivity is also related to listening, and both are hallmarks of repressed feminine attributes now being restored to consciousness. Part of our shift includes moving away from how much we focus our minds on outcomes to how well we can listen at a deeper level of awareness.

And speaking of receivers….

February 17 was to be the day TV stations stopped sending analog broadcast signals and begin to transmit only digitally (the government recently delayed this process). Hooray, more change. Technically, that shift is from transmitting a variable electromagnetic wave to a series of pulses. The original wave can literally be broken into bits, sent in pulses, and be recreated on the receiving end using basic computer language – meaning on or off, or yes and no. I don’t mean to go all technoid on you, but I observe with curiosity how consciousness always manifests in form what is happening behind the scenes. How is that relevant? Stay tuned, I’ll be back with more after this break.

Did you grow up with rabbit-ear antennas? (Yes, I’m of that vintage.) We had to adjust the position of the antenna for each station we wanted to watch. And maybe add some tinfoil. No matter what we did there was almost always some interference disturbing the wave, leading to an imperfect, yet viewable, picture on the TV. With digital transmission the picture is now either perfect or non-existent. We have eliminated snow, static, moving lines and fuzzy pictures – but interfere with the reception and the picture stops. It’s either on or off. In other words, the system is precise about the signal it recognizes and there is no grey area.

Have you noticed the grey area disappearing from your own experience these days? Have you found a reduced ability to accept energies that feel out of tune with you, sort of like there is no longer tolerance for the old ways? Clarity is a hallmark of the new operating system, and we accept no iffyness. Something either matches you or it doesn’t, or something opens to you or it doesn’t. This is the new system of yes or no.

We choose based on a deep knowing, without analysis, trusting the way we are being informed. And we’re definitely practicing this way of listening; sometimes we fail to honor what we hear. Ever notice how quickly things become uncomfortable when choosing what doesn’t match? Ouch, learning curve.

I’m suggesting that the operating system of the new reality needs us to match it before we can enter and create within it. What if aligning with that new reality doesn’t happen through mental awareness, but is connected to how well we can receive? And what if the new reality is intent upon delivering fulfillment of what our soul deeply desires while also delivering the same to everyone else at the same time? Now that would be a magnificent creation to experience, and one that I believe is our destiny.

Perhaps it is worth whatever it takes to let go of any remaining old programs that say such an experience can’t be yours. I don’t know about you, but boy howdy that makes me want to get my ducks in a row, leaves me feeling happy as a clam and as good as gold.

I dislike stuffy, academic prose that makes your brain go quietly away while your eyes glaze and your mouth slowly drops open. Cripes, I almost submitted that kind of article for this column, and out of sheer guilt I apologize for something you never read but what was nearly foisted on you by my hand. I started writing, wanting to share some thoughts about this amazing time we live in, and pretty much wrote a book’s worth of material crushed into 700 words. Made me
groggy just trying to proofread it.

I called that article The Two Earths, and have again done so for this rewrite. The original article used my two biggest words: transformation and consciousness. I even used them in a compound sentence as a kind of twofer – and, sadly, an instant block to any further reading. I’ll try not to do it again.

The challenge is, those two big words do pretty much sum up most of what I talk about, and they’re darn handy when trying to speak in a…well…stuffy and academic manner. I could probably just say that I am involved in the nitty gritty of how life is changing, what is happening behind the scenes and the effects the changes are having on people. Consciousness R Us and all that.

So, the world isn’t what it used to be. Boy, there’s some good news. I was getting downright exhausted staying silent in a world that wanted to hear nothing about how everything was going to be changing big time. Now I say, “Hey, everything is changing big time,” and everybody goes DUH. You’d think all of us “dawning of the age of Aquarius” singalongs would experience smooth sailing, but noooooo. And why is that? Might it be that we forgot to include ourselves in the original equation of making a shift to peace, love and understanding? We’ve been preachin’ and teachin’ about the new age for so long that when it arrived, perhaps we got flustered and relapsed into a mentality that there still must be something left to fix. T’aint nothin’ broke. Sure, we’ve got a few jillion things re-creating themselves (including us), but maybe we can quit with the vigilance already.

So, how about no more academic exercise? How about appreciating and acknowledging how much we have worked…and healed…and grown…and…transformed. Do you realize that the new world that was just around the bend has become a reality? I ask, because it isn’t yet very visible, so you might have missed it. We have actually brought a new reality into being, but we act like it’s not there. Do you know why?

Maybe we have not understood the profound thing we have accomplished, and so we don’t recognize that there is yet one more choice to be made. Perhaps our final choice. We have evolved in a world governed by fear, disliking every moment of the power plays and competition that suck the life from us, yet we somehow think we can’t move on until the last particle of the old world dissipates. Don’t you find at least some irony in the idea that a new world of our creation awaits our participation, yet we don’t step into it because we’re now afraid or otherwise unwilling to do so?

We became good at navigating the old world of polarity and competition. You know, that one that so expertly binds through endless fear of some external threat we must prepare for. We wanted to change all that, and now we have a new world with the qualities we desire, just waiting to be inhabited. Waiting, in fact, to be chosen. Two Earths, simultaneous in existence (for now), yet offering us completely different experiences. The old one requiring excessive use of mind to maintain the illusion of control over endless painful experiences, and the new one requiring a surrender of mind, opening of heart and release of control into the mystery of the unknown. Seems a no-brainer to me, yet we still do get to decide for ourselves.

As I see it, we’re entering a critical phase in our transformation that may be pushing for a decision before the window of opportunity closes. The question, at least, is simple: which earth do you choose?

I have spent hours starting this article over several times. Sheets of legal paper surround me with dozens of outrageously brilliant thoughts that I was so cleverly going to weave together into a poignant, yet gracefully written piece of art. However, it’s just not happening that way. My energy is requiring something more like a blurt-it-right-out-there approach. Here goes.

It’s kind of nice writing for the readers of this publication. I can skip so many preliminaries about shifts, changes, transformation, paradigms, and numerous assorted things about light. We’ve all competently learned to repeat them over and over again without even a hint of energy. It reminds me of the time I was going to be flunked out of confirmation class for not being able to repeat some wordy article of creed.

Just for clarity, let me reflect the view that we are moving out of a consciousness of duality characterized by competition and polarization, and into a state of being that is Oneness. The world created — while in the deep density of duality — has become severely unbalanced. That world is now being rebalanced. Chaos is the new buzzword that refers to the transition where all crystallized forms holding the matrix of death are being replaced by fluid, living organisms.

The move to the clear expansiveness above the fog of duality is more difficult and personally challenging than the mind might think. There is no hierarchy in a unified whole. The ego is evolved in a system where value is found in being one over another in some way. If the ego doesn’t feel one up, it feels one down. As the system the ego has learned to be in withers and dies, it will contract and grip in fear.

The ego self has actually been a marvelous creation that was perfectly designed for the purpose of our evolution, so don’t be putting it down and frying to kill it. Love it up, thank it for an extraordinary performance and tell it that it can relax now because that is its new job. Tell your ego that it gets to retire and get the RV it always wanted while you get to graduate and be present in the  in the world as a fully employed joyful performer choreographed to dance to the music of the One. Have a little party, then let go and take your place. The place only you can take.

Perhaps it will take a little while for you to adjust to a way of life that honors you for being who you really are. In fact, it’s a way of life that requires you to be who you really are. A reminder in case you just forgot: the other way of life is going away. Maybe you will find yourself involved in a process that includes the question “Who am I?” You, of course, are the only one who actually has that answer, but I can offer some things for you to check off the list of who you’re not. Ready?

You are not your salutation: Honorable, Mr., Professor, Mrs., Miss, Ms., Sir, Dr., Rev., Rabbi, or even Honorable Rev. Dr. Professor.

You are not your degree or a bunch of little letters after your name: A.A., B.S., PhD, M.D., D.D.S., D.C., A.S.P.C.A., E.T.C.

You are not your title: President, CEO, Second Vice President of an Associate to a Possibly Important Person in their Own Standing, or Wizard.

You are not your system of thought: Pick any religion. Pick any expression of that religion (include traditional, conservative, liberal, or esoteric). Any “isms” you espouse go here. Then add any alternative systems. Oh, by the way, the isms are all going away. Take care, New Ageism is an ism too.

You are not your credentials: List here.

You are not anybody else’s notion about who you are: Anybody.

I, others, and the, planet await your full revealing of who you are. If you need help, then still your busy mind and focus on a color. I suggest Gold. Hint: You are Golden.

The energies that anchored during the 12:12 time last December made it more possible to make the movement away from the egocentric place and out of duality into your rightful place within the whole. At the time of this writing it appears that the energies building in June make it more possible for those moving out of duality to become synchronized as a unified organism. Each one of us is challenged by that final fear that shows up when we quit talking words at each other and understand that all along we were meant to become the living principles of all the promises of all those systems.

Despite all of the countless ways we have given name and form to the way we see things, I find it possible to distill the essential guidance down to two directives from two unquestionable Sources. The heavenly Father says, “Choose Love.” The Earthly Mother says, “Be Here.”

Choose love. Be here.